I’ve never known.  I started out working at places that would hire me with no skills and then when my son was 5 and I moved with the ex to Florida I decided enough was enough and I started to seek out jobs that paid better and provided me with opportunities to gain training and skills. I taught myself all of the Microsoft Office software programs by reading “for dummies” books and I upgraded with each and every job I took.  I worked quite a few jobs between 1998 and 2004 when I got my current job.  I worked for HSN (yes the television store!), worked for 2 electronic distributors, one crazy lady who sold assisted living reports to people, a collection agency and a few strange other jobs during that time prior to the job I currently have.  I learned one major thing from all of those jobs and that one thing is and was that every person who makes the real money had a college degree.  I also noticed that the people that had worked their way up over the course of 20 years were desperate to keep their jobs and seemed to not have the skills necessary to compete in the workforce any longer because their skills were deemed only valuable to the company they worked for 20 years.

In light of the recession and my having just completed my undergraduate degree, I have been considering long and hard “Where do I go from here?”  I enrolled in my Masters degree and slugged through the first few weeks of class wondering if I made the right choice. I have been looking at the job postings with curiosity and I imagine that most recent college graduates would and are doing the same thing.  It’s dismal.

So while emotionally and mentally I am ready for bigger fish to fry, I am trying to re-grease the frying pan I’m currently in because I am grateful to be in any pan so to speak.

The biggest frustration to me is that I didn’t obtain a degree that is specific to one job title. I can do a lot of things with my degree; however this also means that I can’t simply do a job search for “Elementary Teacher” or “Podiatrist” etc.  It means that I spend a lot of time looking at all sorts of jobs and try to figure out exactly what all the verbiage really equates to.  It’s insane the way some job ads are written.  I imagine some of them are really file clerks but the job duties make it out to sound like rocket science before the ad is over.

All of this just to reiterate that this recession sucks but yet I’m thankful that I spent the last 4 years getting a degree instead of taking expensive trips to Mexico on boats or spending hundreds on custom made frames for pictures to be hung on the living room wall. (That might not make sense to you…but it makes plenty to me!!)

When I was 18 I wanted to go become a phlebotomist or become a courtroom stenographer.  I still see both of those jobs as valid and dream worthy.  I just can’t see myself pulling blood for $12/hr or getting carpal tunnel in front of some fat judge day after day.  I see both of those jobs as working with the public and probably no fun at all. However, I can easily close my eyes and see myself doing either of them happily.  Yah insane right?

But really the bottom line is this. I search through job listings and try to place myself within those jobs. I saw one today for a Credit Analyst for a company I always admired…but I was a Credit Analyst without a degree and sure this job probably pays a great deal more because of the “degree required” in the job description but really, do I want to do something I’ve already done before only for more money?  Errr…wait, isn’t that why I went to college?

Oh by now perhaps you see my real conundrum. I still have no earthly fucking idea what I want to be when I grow up.  And so …I trudge along in my 2^nd class gaining my Masters degree for the sole purpose of being the ONLY person in my family to have ever achieved that goal.

Oh …my priorities?  Yes, they are fucked.  By the way I now find that I work for someone that doesn’t have a degree and makes far more than I do.  She even asked me recently if I thought she should have a degree. I smiled and said kindly “I work for a University, have done so for the last nearly 5 years, I think EVERYONE should have a degree, don’t you?”   I got a blank stare.

*sigh*  It would have been so much easier to go to a phlebotomist program or …uh…been a stenographer.  Did you always know what you wanted to do?  Are you doing it?  If so, do you love doing it?  If not, do you wish you were doing it?

p.s. I do really love my job….I just never planned to be doing this..so it makes me quiver sometimes.

Edited to add:

Average Phlebotomist Salary: $30000.

Stenographers are now referred to as Court Reporters, Wage and salary court reporters had median annual earnings of $45,610 in May 2006. The middle 50 percent earned between $33,160 and $61,530.

Perhaps I want to be a court reporter? hmmm
 

An email I wrote to my first boss at my current University job.  She no longer works for the University, but she was pivotal in helping me get started in college. First and foremost she hired me, then she encouraged me, and then she also mentored me and then right when I was feeling safe and content she left me.  But I was ok because she made me safe and content before she departed.  She hired me in August of 2004, I started college in January of 2005.  I still have five week’s to go, but I just started my last class, an Environment class, today.

Renee,

This morning I logged into my last class and posted my Bio for the last time.  I printed out my Syllabus for the last time as an undergrad student.  In January of 2005 I thought that this day would never come.  When you’re looking at 40 unfinished credits they certainly seem daunting, but I have learned that like the hare, slow and steady win’s the race.  I can’t believe how much I have changed as a person.  Yes, I’ve gained tons of new information and knowledge, but more so than that, I have a newfound level of confidence and an even bigger sense of self worth.  I now know that I can accomplish anything I set my mind to, so long as I make the sacrifices and am willing to hang in there for the long haul.

I imagine that many people before me have felt this, but it’s almost impossible for me to find the words to explain it except to say it feels as exhilarating as that moment when you are riding a roller coaster, the moment before the long decent, the anticipation of what is to come next, simply because you managed to stay calm while climbing upwards.  I no longer view other people’s successes with an “it must be nice” attitude.  I now see success around me and realize that it does not come easy, but that it can certainly be gained.

I’ve always had much to offer the workplace, but now I have concrete proof and evidence to back up my work experience.  More importantly, I now know that I can overcome challenges, make the necessary sacrifices and achieve great things.  If I were an athlete this accomplishment might equal crossing the finish line.  Thankfully I am not a racer because this accomplishment means that I have proven I can always fight the good fight, I can always rise the occasion and I can always become a better person. 

I have learned how to find information, reiterate information and utilize information to work smarter not harder.  I used to think if I won the lottery I would buy a new car, perhaps a mansion.  I now know I wouldn’t quit working, I would instead use that money to better the world around me.  That change of heart came with gaining a college degree.  Understanding that the world is bigger than just who I am, but that who I am can make the world a better place.  These lessons weren’t learned in a book, they were gained in the process of being a student.

I set my goals to achieve a college education largely because of my responsibilities towards my son.  He was 12 years old when I began my journey.  He’s now 16 and he could drive himself to my graduation. I think my journey changed his outlook as well.  I didn’t set out to do that, it was a wonderful byproduct of all that I became.  It simply rubbed off with little to no effort.

 
Because of you I learned the importance of mentorship.  You took an interest in who I was and more importantly who I wanted to become, changing the small view I had of myself into a dream that I acted on rather than I dream I merely dismissed.  I strongly believe I could not have gotten here without that support and nudge when it was most needed.  You were the umbrella during times of rain. 

I have no doubt that I will continue on with new dreams and goals and will succeed. Not because of that piece of paper, but because of the degree’s in which my heart has changed because of this accomplishment.   When I was 19 my mother told me I’d never amount to anything, that I would push a broom at McDonalds.  While I have nothing against burger chains, I dreamt of much more.  All anyone needs to succeed in life is a dream, someone that believes in them (and yes you can choose to simply believe in yourself for yourself too!), and action.  Do something to get where you want to go every single day.  That is something I repeated to myself every single day.  And each step I took got me closer to achieving my goals.  And now that I’m here I’m dreaming new dreams, making new goals, success has no ceiling.

 Thanks for everything you did when everything you did mattered the most.  I am estatic and I am proud of myself.  That is a new feeling for me.  Pride in oneself is priceless.

 Kristy

 Ten small steps still equal one giant step, standing still gets you nowhere.