shishnit.org

In early 2008 we began to seriously think about buying a house. The home we were living in was extremely overpriced and over-valued. I imagine a lot of people felt that same way about a lot of houses at the time. I wrote about our experiences with our previous landlord here who wanted to sell us the house but we could not afford the $315,000 that he was wanting at the time and tried to purchase his son’s home…which was also extremely overpriced (and is also still not sold today).

I blogged again about my viewpoint on our home purchase a few months later and my viewpoitns 9 months after purchasing it here. I was still feeling relatively good about our choices.

Then one day I googled my old leased house (the one that I really really loved and wanted to buy for the entire year I lived in it) here. The picture dissapeared from that blog post so here it is again.

That house really urked me because I loved it. It was perfect in a lot of ways. Today out of curiosity I looked up that house again…just to see what time has done since last September. I know everytime we’ve driven by it (and we have to make an effort to do so) it has had a for sale sign out front. Today I found out that the house was foreclosed on. I felt like Karma had finally had her say. That’s what you get landlord guy….that’s what you get for raising our rent on us when we were attempting to purchase your son’s house. (a house still not sold either!)

And then I found it….the for sale ad. 116,900!!

It’s now selling for less than we paid for our house. L They wanted 315k when we lived in it two years ago. Oh if only I had waited 2 entire fucking years…..lol as if. Someone got fucked on that house and it wasn’t us. Thank you Jesus. But I still wanted to barf right in that open toilet right there…the same one I peed in for an entire year of my life right before going to bed at night.

But then oddly….I started to think about our house. The one we did buy. The one that we’ve had to fix several things in. The one that needs new air conditioning duct work as I type. The one that has had termites!! The one that needs a trench dug out around the addition. The one that’s driving me nuts right now. And I’m still happy because I’ve had some fantastic moments in that house with the big huge library. The one that isn’t a real estate transaction or a memory captured by google maps but the one that is our  HOME sweet HOME.

She has the big giant console stereo turned up way high…the sun is streaming into the big picture window of our 1970’s ranch house. 

“never gonna stop

give it up

such a dirty mind…… my my my woah….my ‘m’m'm’y Sharona!”

We are dancing.  She is dusting the glass top tables.  I am dancing around the room, sliding to and fro on my sock clad feet.

This one memory that remains for some odd reason…a happy one.  I can still smell the furniture polish, remember the beam of sun through the big picture window in the living room glittering off the tall orange vase in the corner. 

The only time I ever remember anything about my mother fondly..is when that song comes on.  It’s brief…it’s fleeting…I’m a little girl in an instant, grinding my non-existent hips to the jive. 

Ohhhh but maybe it’s just because I really had a thing for The Knack at age 9.

BEGIN RANT I really want to spend a long long time bitching about my electricity bill.  Last months bill?  $98.  This months bill $298.98!!  That’s 3 times the amount.  Fuck all those people telling me that I should be used to this cold weather because I’m from PA.  Houses in FL are not built for freezing weather. Also, I would like to state that while my bill is 3 times the amount…Rick and I have been walking around our house with big heavy socks on, long pants etc.  We cannot even get our house heated to 68 on any given day!!  Gah!!! Fucking FREEZING WEATHER!!  Don’t tell me about how cold it is in Denver, Ohio, PA, etc. etc.  You choose to live in those states and are well prepared. I’m in Florida and I want tropical weather.  Period.  Also, don’t’ tell me I’m a PA native and should be “used to” this.  That’s crap.  I’m used to 70 degrees in the wintertime.  Something livable only!  I leave my house to get warm in my car or in some retail location etc.  It’s warmer at work!! END RANT

Ok now onto more important things:

I asked for photos and permission.  I met the girlfriend and I really like her.  We had a rather long and extensive conversation over dinner last Friday.  She asked me tons of questions and it was a pleasure to talk to her.  She’s smart, bright, pretty, and respectful all at once. All the things a Mommy looks for.  But more importantly I can see why Keith likes her.  As with all things in life change happens…but for the time being they are together and are happy.  And they are cute together.  He’s nice to her, she’s nice to him.  They seem to be having a good time. And they are open and honest with me.  I won’t blog personal things but I will say that they talk to me on a level that I appreciate.  They respect me and in turn that makes it so easy to respect them.  Chelsea is also friendly and down to earth.  I like her.  I’m happy about it all because I also like Keith.  Strange to say that perhaps about one’s own kid because obviously I love him madly, but I also am grateful that I LIKE him too. 

The entire time I was with them, I kept thinking about my first love…how new everything is etc.  I felt old but I also felt proud of Keith and happy for him to be experiencing these things in his own life.  I fully expect that Keith is now not going to crawl back into his crib, grab his bottle and take a nap ever again.  I’ve accepted it now.   Almost.  I asked Keith for pictures and asked for permission to blog ‘em.  He said “Yes. You can.” So……look….totally sweet…

Being a parent is a wild unimaginable ride on a roller coaster.  One that you cannot anticipate and one that I wouldn’t trade for the world. I’m going to meet Keith’s first “talked about” girlfriend on Friday at 3 p.m.  I’m more nervous about whether she’ll like me than whether I’ll like her.  I already know I’ll like her if Keith does.  Weird that I feel so strongly about that, but I do.

Tonight was one of those nights when I really found out that I am not the mother I had.  I’m positive of it.  And it feels awesome.  As though I won the lottery because I can be a better Mother than I ever imagined for my own child.  So much more I could blog but I won’t.  Being a Mom…it’s really not something you do until your child is walking and talking and out there experiencing life not holding your hand.  Keith is 17, I’m so proud of him.

My 89 yr old grandfather reads the newspaper from front to back every single day. Now of course he’s reading a small-town paper, but still! Every word! (even the classifieds and the lost dog ad’s…all of it, he knows all the town news!) He then spends the majority of his day’s reading books. He can go through about 3 a day sometimes. He watches 1 hour of the news on TV every single day at noon. Then it’s back to reading. So his day goes “newspaper, read, news, read read read, sleep”.

He’s almost completely deaf in his old age and screams and yells in order to communicate. My grandmother begs him to get a hearing aid. NO GO he says. He does not want to “look” old. (smirk)

However, a few years ago his eyesight started to go wonky and he immediately visited an eye doctor and scheduled in cataract surgery asap, within a week both eyes were done. When asked why he won’t get a hearing aid but he’s willing to allow doctors to cut his eyes, he replied with his typical scream:

“Because damn it I need to see to read and if I can’t read I don’t care what anyone has to say!”

My grandfather is my hero.