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  1. Norplant – Health part 1

    June 15, 2007 by shishnit

    When I was 23 years old and my son was 6 months old I decided to get Norplant implanted into my arm because I did not want to have any more children until or unless we were financially able. It was 1993 and this was touted as the miracle birth control that you did not have to think about. I knew I did not want to have anymore children right away.  My ex-husband felt that he wasn’t sure he wanted anymore at all.  We weren’t financially in a good place and didn’t want to risk an unwanted pregnancy.

    Norplant was in my opinion America’s biggest mistake in birth control and has since been taken off of the market due to so many issues.  You can read about that here

    However, within months I went to doctors and complained about headaches, extreme weight gain (that occurred after his birth and after Norplant not prior to either).  Heavy bleeding with my periods and periods that lasted far too long or did not arrive for months at a clip. Within months of having Norplant placed in my upper left arm (5 capsules in a fan shape) I was constantly sick.  I complained of constant headaches and was given a plethora of headache medications and most of them didn’t work.  It was a constant low-grade fever that made me feel tired and miserable constantly.  Thankfully I was a fulltime stay at home Mom because I could not have held down a job to save my life.  I also didn’t have health insurance for long periods of time and the Norplant was placed in my arm thanks to the welfare system.  And the welfare system was all about giving you birth control but I had to go to doctors for 6 months straight in order to have the devices removed.  When they put the devices in my arm swelled and was black and blue.  When they removed them (they inserted and removed in the OB/GYN’s office with one small incision and local anesthesia) the doctor had to put his knee on the elbow area of my arm and yank them out so hard I thought he was going to pop my elbow out of the socket.

    The entire Norplant incident in my life was mentally painful and physically exhausting.  Upon removal I still got headaches and while they weren’t as severe they were just as constant and miserable.  My girlfriend Joyce had the same experiences with Norplant and we’ve both regretted our choices all along to have it implanted in the first place.  She had her Norplant removed 2 weeks after I had mine taken out.  The welfare system paid to have mine removed because my medical bills due to side affects were too constant for them to say no to my request. 

    When I had my son my periods had returned and were normal.  Then I got Norplant and my periods were shorter but far bloodier (sorry but I’m going for pure honesty here).  Upon removal my periods completely disappeared.  They just stopped.  Around the time I had Norplant inserted I gained 85 lbs within 3 months.  I attributed this oddity to being Norplant related but could not grasp it or figure it out at all.  I was frustrated and angry with doctors and without good health insurance that gave me choices as a patient I just gave up for quite some time. 

    For years when I went to gynecologists and complained that I had NO period they told me “here take this birth control pill and it’ll be fine”.  But they never did any testing and they never investigated why I gained 85 lbs AFTER having a baby and/or why I had other symptoms.  I mostly ignored some of my symptoms because after all I had a new baby, financial problems and a frustrating marriage.  Those things sapped me of energy to think about myself and my well being.

    I had Norplant in my arm for about 6 or 7 months prior to removal.  When the decision was made that it had to come out my ex-husband went and got a vasectomy without much discussion with me.  I suppose during that time he decided more kids were not in the works for him.  Oddly it pissed me off but secretly I didn’t care because I knew I wasn’t truly in love with him and did not want any more children with him.

    Norplant was a nightmare and next to my choice to marry ex-husband it remains one of my biggest mistakes to date.  I made the decision offhandedly and trusted doctors and did no research.  There was no internet in 1993 and I was not the same questioning person I am today.  Norplant…you sucked!  I will and have hated you for 14 long years.
     

     

     

     

    Category health | Tags: | No Comments

  2. direct eye contact!!

    June 15, 2007 by shishnit

    I went to the oncologist yesterday.  Rick went along.  Dr. Oncologist (the guy that I saw four times but he saw it all with regards to my Uterus…and…my Vagina….oh yah and my Cervix too) told me that I am a high risk for female cancers because I have PCOS.  He also told me (and actually looked directly at me while doing so!) that I can go back to Dr. OB/GYN (who is really funny and even he too has been all up in my shiz) and go on Clomid.  Or perhaps he said that Dr. OB/GYN will send me to a Reproductive Endocrinologist.  We shall see on that one.  He said it was up to Dr. OB/GYN but that he would send him a nice professional letter with his ongoing recommendations and treatment.  He closed out our relationship by stating, “we need to get an egg…and some sperm….yah we need that too…in the right place and then you’ll be all good to go!” 

    The thing I always liked about Dr. Oncololgist was that when he would tell me what was happening and why and he would repeat his question of “you went to Dr. OB/Gyn wanting a baby…right?”  I would always respond with, “yes but it’s important to me that I am healthy and ok above all else.”  He would then repeat, “Yes but you want a baby.” and he would continue speaking about my file while he looked every where (the ceiling, my file, his hands, my shoes) but at me.

    Either way, now that Dr. Oncologist looked right at me and smiled that means I will live.  I’m convinced he doesn’t look at his patients because he’s not sure if the big C is going to take them away and he doesn’t want to get attached.  He shook my hand twice and I thanked him for taking my non-cancerous female parts seriously and helping me.  (you think I didn’t say that?….you’d be wrong!)

    Goodbye Dr. Oncologist that doesn’t look directly at possibly dying people, I liked you because you’re smart smart smart and because your staff is awesomely helpful.  (not that Dr. Oncologist will ever read this….because he won’t.  He’s too busy getting smarter.)

    So….off to make an appointment with Dr. OB/GYN who has seen my friend’s innards too, but we don’t care because he’s funny and he births him a lot of babies and he will never deliver a cancer diagnosis…so he can always look right at me.

     We’re excitedly reserved.  I am oddly grateful for my experiences from sitting in an oncologist’s office repeatedly looking at plastic girl parts with different stages of plastic cancer attached to them.  It profoundly changed me.  I will never put those waiting room patient faces out of my mind.  Never.  Perhaps the only way to do that is to concentrate on helping and assisting them instead of truly having a forever picture in your head.  I don’t know…..

    I feel blessed to have had constant “concern” but additionally constant “negative” pathology reports. 

    Category health, infertility, love and marriage | Tags: | 1 Comment

  3. (&#@!

    June 7, 2007 by shishnit

    My frustration level is immensely high right now. I need to vent.  Tuesday’s procedure went off without a hitch. I woke up from anesthesia as if I took a nice little nap.  I was fine.  I was fine throughout the day.  I slept for a few hours but I had no pain, no discomfort.  Nothing.  So I didn’t take my prescription to the pharmacy for the percocet’s.  I skipped it.  I was fine.

     Yesterday I came to work. I had tons of issues getting access and some of the access to systems that I need, I STILL DO NOT HAVE.  Despite numerous phone calls and ticket submissions etc.  A long boring foray into the IT world..and still no resolution.  This type of thing always stresses me out and aggravates me.  I’m just that way.

    By 3 p.m. yesterday I had the world’s biggest migraine.  It was horrible.  I don’t get migraines so I was concerned.  It finally dawned on me, this was probably an after affect of the anesthesia since the day before I had no issues whatsoever.  No matter what it was, I was in so much pain I was literally wiping those tiny tears from my eyes.  The kind that squeeze out due to pain overload.  My head hurt so bad I hunted down some Ibuprophen and it did NOTHING.  Zip…zilch.  Nothing at all to relieve anything.  About an hour later I was ok enough to drive myself home.  I stayed my entire shift though.  I drove straight to Walgreens to get my prescription filled.  Sure it was probably for uterine pain relief but still I was barely able to function.  I sat in the drive-thru at Walgreens and listened to the pharmacist tell me that he was unable to read the doctor’s name and or ID number and since this was a barbiturate he could not fill it and since the outpatient portion of the hospital was now closed he could not contact them.

     This morning on principal I called my doctor’s office, the outpatient clinic, etc.  I was and am still pissed.  Why bother giving a patient a prescription that can’t be legibly read?  My oncologists nurse took care of it.  She was able to decipher who the normal doctor’s that shadow my oncologist are and determine what the codes were.  She rocks.  I advised her however that I will never have another procedure with Dr. Oncologist unless he provides the prescription prior to the procedure so that this never happens to me again.  She said, “I can understand your request.”

    Trust me this is the shortened version of this long boring “piss me off” story.  I’m leaving out the on call doctor’s pissy attitude and her telling me “you don’t need percocet, you neeed double the dosage of motrin, you can buy that yourself.  I advised her “why should I buy something when my insurance covers prescriptions just because some doctor cant write his name legible?”  She also advised me that I shouldn’t be in pain and that I needed something to reduce swelling as my pain was a direct result of swelling of the uterus.  I then asked her if she has ever had a D&C done to herself personally?”  She said no.  To which I said, “I hope you have to have 4 of them done in the matter of 18 months and then when you talk to patients you will have empathy because you will know what they feel.”  She was silent.  Thank god she’s not my doctor.

    Did I want the percocet?  No, I didn’t ask anyone to give me a prescription.  However, I wanted something for the pain that I felt was a direct result of my outpatient surgery.  My head was throbbing, tears rolling down my face and some doctor that’s never met me is telling me how I should be feeling.  Fuck her.  Seriously…fuck her.

    Today I am at work, still no access to certain systems.  I still don’t fully know what I am even doing.  My head still hurts but it’s a low throb instead of a make me cry like a baby shooting pain.  I’m tired.  I’m sick.  I’m at work.  I’m clueless as to how to make things work properly.  But I know I’ll be ok.

    Last night Rick was great.  He massaged my neck and my shoulders.  He was sympathetic.  He was there for me.  Thank goodness!!  I should have known on Tuesday that I got off easy. 

    I have a follow up appointment with my oncologist on June 13th in the afternoon.  That means I’ll come to work in Tampa, drive back across the bridge and have to go downtown to his office.  That’ll be another loverly day. 
    Last night when I was in pain all I wanted to do was soak in the Jacuzzi bath.  Guess what?  No baths for 3 weeks after a D&C.  And no sex….  No relief!! 

    Blah…..I need a plate of cheese to go with my whine.

    Category career, health | Tags: | 2 Comments

  4. Uncle Ricky

    June 6, 2007 by shishnit

    This morning’s procedures went fairly well.  I did not get sick from the anesthesia.  That is an amazingly good thing.  I was rather tired when I got home but I think that’s from lack of sleep due to getting up so early and perhaps the hang effects of the anesthesia.

    Rick went with me.  I don’t think I’ve ever said this, at least not on my blog.  However, when someone asks me about my husband I always respond in a positive way.  Always quick to say something kind about him.  I do this without forethought.  But recently it has dawned on me just how amazingly special that is to be able to truly and fully love your husband.  That is a gift.

    Matthew came to visit.  He’s so sweet…he makes my ovary throb.  And this picture…good golly the sweetness.
     

    Category Rick, health, love and marriage | Tags: | 1 Comment

  5. no tolerance

    June 5, 2007 by shishnit

    D&C tomorrow morning. Have to be there at 7 a.m.  I feel bad because Rick just got home from work today.  It’s 10:18 p.m.  Poor guy.  And he worked all day long in the heat.  And will have to get up early tomorrow and take me to the hospital, sit around at the hospital and then take my cranky ass home again.  He’s a gem.  Love that boy.

    Today I caught someone in my class cheating.  In typical fashion her response was…
    “I am an ethical person and will make good on this assignment.  I wouldn’t expect any less from anyone else.  I would ask that you please refrain from the tone emails and just STOP!  I realize you probably don’t feel well and I am willing to let most things slide.  But this is something that just happened under no control of my own.  It is getting very difficult working as a team when clearly you are not.  Enough.  We have two more weeks so lets just keep the emails short and to the point and the tone left out.  Thank you.”

    My response?

    I am not using “tone” and I am feeling fine.  Please do not make this personal between you and I.  I ran the paper through the checker and reported my findings, period.  I did this in the best interest of the entire team.  Had this been turned in and the University found it, it could have been detrimental to all involved.  We avoided that, this is a good thing not a bad thing.  Please do not take this personal.  It isn’t for me.  We are doing great as a team, let’s just move forward from here with our additional day.

    Cheaters never like being caught I suppose.  I have no tolerance for them either.  I have busted 5 of them in the last 2 1/2 years.  I check.  I don’t like plagiarism at all. 

    I’m going to go hang with the man for a few before we have to hit the sack. 

    Category college, health | Tags: | 1 Comment

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